Friday, August 31, 2007

 

Jack's curriculum night

Both of Jack's teachers were there last night. THe one that is coming back from maternity leave and the one right now, who is in heer 20's and has all the dad's in a tizzy. I dont know how she teaches in those FM pumps. She dresses classy enough, but it still shows that she is hot and knows it. (she is married). But despite that, she is good teacher. I almost wish she would be the teacher the entire year. 1st grade is somewhat the same as when Alyssa was there, but they have added/changed things. I have to remember that its only 1st grade. The kids dont even get graded yet. WIth the work they have, you tend to think that its much more serious then it really should be. I would say about 1/2 the class showed up.

I finally met the parents of the one kid that Jack has befriended. I couldnt figure out where he lived as the bus stop he got off was in front of a neighborhood where I knew many people. Noone in that neighborhood knew this kid. Turns out he is in the neighborhood across the street. Note that these are the most expensive homes in our area. I am surprised they are not in private school, but having just moved here, I guess they did not have time. our school system is not bad, but I suspect that other kids in that neighborhood all go private. Anyway, it really doesnt make that much of a difference, as any friend that Jack makes is ok.

AFterwards I was talking to another mom whose son is in the 3rd grade class next to Alyssa's . In there they have 11 girls and 5 boys. Alyssa is 10 boys and 6 girls. I dont get it. The only thing is that Alyssa's teacher is very structured and maybe a lot of parents of boys want that type of teacher more.

Long weekend coming up. nothing much going on. Skating competition on sunday morning and if the weather holds out the pool at teh club. Crazy weather here. 3 weeks of NO rain and now rain every afternoon.

Tonight going out to dinner witht some friends and got a sitter. Oh and note to self. NO ASIAN food with MSG ! I have such a MSG migraine!!!

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

 

curriculum night.

Last night was curriculum night for Alyssa's class. Since Felix had to take Alyssa to hebrew school, I got Jack a haircut (badly needed) and then took him to his friend's house while I went to the school.

I skipped out on the PTA meeting since I will be back on Thursday for Jack. Only about 1/2 the parents showed up for Alyssa's classroom. I was hoping this one parent would show up since Alyssa has issues with her daughter (who apparently is mean), and I wanted to approach her parent(s) on it. Oh well. I did mention to the teacher about it.

I REALLY like Alyssa's teacher. For example, she does teach script, but would prefer to teach the kids how to use the keyboard. She feels that being able to type on a computer is more important that learning cursive writing. Also, she deviates some from the textbook on spelling to work more on learning "how to spell words" then memorizing words. I do love her discipline technique. If a child has to move their clip , during recess they have to be in timeout and write about the infraction. This way they practice writing at the same time they think about what they did wrong. I wish I could use that one at home, but it probably would be full of complaints and take forever. School rules are much easier to follow than home rules due to peer pressure it seems. I came out of the classroom knowing that Alyssa has the right teacher. There are mostly boys in her class; Only 7 girls and 10 boys. Other classes has more girls. I guess because of the style of teacher she is, she is better suited to the boys. I also talked to this one mom after class whose son also has ADHD and she doesnt medicate either.

Meanwhile, Jack came home and said that his teacher asked that he learn to spell "intelligent" since he uses that word an aweful lot. I did show him :)

Today is a crazy day. Last day of swimming combined with theatre for Alyssa and baseball for JAck. Since Jack starts gymnastics next Wed, there are some Wed's where he will have gymnastics and baseball, while Alyssa has theatre at 5pm. So at roswell Rec at 3:15 to 4:15 and then Alyssa will have her thing at 5pm. FElix will handle Jack if he has baseball, when he gets home around 5. I do have an every other week carpool with the theatre class. you gotta love carpools! Maybe I can do one for gymnastics if I find someone else with jack. At least bring him home or I can bring their kid home every other week.

Monday, August 27, 2007

 

ADHD today...

I heard this over the weekend. One Pediatrician has 50% of their patients on ADHD meds. It seems like everyone has it. Why?

1. I believe that as kids many of us "had it", but it was not something diagnosed unless it was really disruptive, and then as something else.

2. As kids we respected and obeyed our parents (I feared my dad's belt). So at home we managed to control ourselves best we could.

3. Back then, kids could be well, kids.. We played outside a bunch. we did not worry about being kidnapped. our parents gave us more freedoms.

4. now that the meds are avail, the thinking is, it works, so why not. why would you not give your kids the meds. Many believe that without meds, you cannot control it with therapy. Well I have never had meds, and I believe I have/had it, but I am ok in society. Also I read that if you give a non ADHD kid meds, they will also perform better at school and concentration. So it works on everyone. Why not just give meds to all the US kids to make them perform their best (being scarcastic here)

5. lack of sleep and too much overstimulation on today's kids. Between computers, video games, tv, and millions of activities, we are over stimulating our kids. I am guilty as everyone else. Also there are sleep issues. Kids are going to school earlier and staying up later to keep up with their busy lives.

Can you believe that yesterday , other than sunday school, the kids did not leave the house. Alyssa mostly played. Jack, well he prefered the TV. But I did make him turn it off at times. I have to be stricter with that. he watches way too much TV. No more. We had an issue with his behavior at baseball . once again, doesnt listen to other people. We could have gone places, but didnt. Alyssa actually was pretty well behaved. Today she will be a nightmare!
She could no get to sleep and could not get up this morning. I know I am in for it.

I am happy that swimming ends this week. I have 2 curriculum nights, plus jack has baseball (will miss tonight). Every night until friday is crazy this week. I am happy that we dont have activities on thursday yet. We dont have anything really planned for this weekend besides Alyssa's skating competition on sunday. I have to learn to take it easy .

Over the weekend we had some bad storms. Friday night we lost electricity for a while, but we were out for a bit of it. Sat, we were at Stone mountain and were on top and they stopped the tram for a while due to some lightening. But the rain stayed away from there and we managed to see the laser show. It was also felix's company picnic. they did a lot for the kids. For the grownups they had beer. My company would never do that.

Friday, August 24, 2007

 

not having a good life right now :(

too many things are not right.

Alyssa is back to being a handful. I really want to get her therapy. Everyone seems to want me to put her on drugs. Yes, teh drugs would work, but what happens when she is not on drugs. How does she learn to cope with things? Felix is so opposed to it as well. Then last night she went back on her word about bedtime that she promised and got her brother involved. They are playing games coming out of their rooms. I am PMS'ing and really lost my cool. I hate to say it, but with Jack I gave him a swat on the butt. That will get his attention, but he really milks it (crying). With Alyssa I took away her doll and she went hysterical about it. I FINALLY had to get Felix involved, who usually ignores all that goes on in the house.

I guess I am at work, then with the kids from teh time they get off the bus, which is an adjustment. Last year I had a few days where they did homework and stuff at the afterschool program.

Also last night I took JAck to find out about cub scouts. He really wants to do it. This is a Felix activity though. I refuse to be the one to do this, as its father/son. So Jack has to talk Felix into it. (who incidentally did not leave the couch the entire time I was gone-sigh). So felix life is helping out in teh morning, going to work, going to the gym to get his full workout. (I never get mine) and then watch TV or use the computer some. I understand he now stressed out because he could lose his job. This is also stressing me out. Even with my job, the severence package just went down. I would have gotten a year's pay, now its down to maybe 6 months.

Oh and lets not talk about my family. My mother is being so unsupporting about everything. She says that I should nto do cub scouts as they are anti-jew. That Alyssa can just do poorly in school and so what. She hated the one guy I found that I liked for Alyssa, as he had had a sense of humor. That I should go back to work full time if I complain about adjusting to be home in the afternoons. That I give my kids too much. the list can go on and on. I really dont want to talk to my family at this point. I should read the parenting book that my brother read, because, after all , he is "parent of the year" (see sarcasm).

so to sum it up.
Felix could be out of work. he is not being very assertive about finding another job. He thinks things should just fall in his lap, aka people should want him and ask for him, versus him asing.

I should have never signed Jack up for baseball. 3 days a week for 6 weeks. too much. The other stuff is not as much, but that does it. Then he wants cub scouts. Its too late to pull out of fall baseball.

My family has nothing nice to say about anything I do at this point.

I am losing my cool with the kids, especially Alyssa.

Alyssa needs help with her ADHD and everyone wants me to medicate. I just want to work on finding some help. Even if I want to medicate, felix refuses. that is not as easy as it seems. Also need a math tutor for her.

The school systems here suck. Either you are in tag, or you are special ed, but if you are in the middle you get lost. I could get Alyssa in IEP, but I dont want her labeled. So far her schoool work, besides subtraction, is fine.

I cant seem to ever lose weight because I eat so much junk.

I am afraid of getting laid off. Of course, my family thoughts is that if I do, just do something I dont like to just make the $$$$.

s.

All this stuff cost $$$ see first item.. then we wont have any.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

 

our trip to the mall.

Sunday at the mall the American Girl place had a 2 hour wait. Knowning that monday afternoon would be quieter, we set out to the mall after Jack had speech. Sure enough no problem! So alyssa got her "kit" that she wanted, aka the set with the crutches, casts, bandages. Jack decided to wanted to spend his own 20$ to buy the dog there. I nixed that idea, even with his own money. It made no sense! So I steered him to KB toys to get something Pokemon. He really wanted to spend his money. That took forever. then i fed them in the food court.
Earlier I had finally gotten them the webkinz charm bracelets that I had promised. They could nto get them until after homework.

Jack had no problem with his homework. Actually got his spelling words right on his first try, but spelled the bonus word "first" as "frist".

Alyssa's homework is tricker. She did good in her math though. I am surprised that addition is FINALLY coming faster to her. There is hope. She also has spelling words. I am mad at myself for not pushing writing more this summer. It really shows. Her writing has gotten sloppy and also she misspells simple things. (not becaues she doesnt know, but because she is not thinking). This year their spelling lists will depend on their abilities. Alyssa always did well on spelling, but I could see her showing up as a bad speller on the test that will determine this. I am not sure if this is a good or bad thing. The other part of her homework is that we have to record her nightly reading. Then write a paragraph based on one chapter or one book, due every friday. One thing I am not sure of is how much involvement is desired from the parents so I emailed her teacher. She had to do a project making a compass rose, and I did help some, but I am not sure if I was suppose to do so or not. 3rd grade is not going to be easy. And we also have hebrew school to deal with, with its own homework now.

Well getting back on track, after dinner they went to the club for their swimming lesson. AFter lessons, we got home probably close to 8pm. Since I wanted Alyssa to do her paragraph already, I told her she could stay up until 9 to also get the playtime she wanted. Well 9 came, and she got upset then. She started to cry that she didnt have enuf playtime. I was very sad about all of this because she also said "my life is so bad". WEll you went to American girl, you got your charm bracelet, you did get some playtime, how bad is your life???
I REALLY need to stop doing nice things for her. I keep doing nice things and going above and beyond to make her happy and then in a moments notice she gets all bent out of shape. I am going to have to have another talk with her about this. I dont like it one bit.
And then with Jack I have to repeat myself 10 times for him to do something until I threaten to take something away. then he does what I want. That has also got to stop.

Sunday, August 19, 2007

 

pics



pics..


1st day of school and Jack and felix with Jack's bottom two teeth missing

Friday, August 17, 2007

 

SAHM without hte SAH part

i feel like a SAHM, but I dont get the part where I get to stay home . We drop the kids off at the b us, I come to work, and get the kids directly from the bus. When they were in afterschool, on occasion I could leave them there and run errands, etc. Now there is no choice but to be at the bus stop at 2:45. Also I ahve both of them. If only one had an activity I could leave the other in afterschool. But it honestly was not worth the 120/week since most days I did get both kids right away. I wish our county has what other counties do: daily afterschool care. But we dont. Its all or nothing

Anyway, some highlights and lowlights from teh 1st week of school.
Getting kids up and to bed --low lights. though Jack better than Alyssa about going to bed. Goal is 8:30 since we want them up at 6:30

Alyssa seems to be doing good in class, but homework already a struggle.

Jack brought home his classwork that did not get done yesterday. I was very upset at first until I realized he is still on coloring! He needs a bigger challenge than that.

Jack made a friend.

Alyssa rather be by herself. she wanted to be in a difference class with other kids that she knows. I had to teach her the life gives you lemons thing...

Being so hot. When they are done with homework, Jack pretty much plays video games and Alyssa is watching TV or bugging me. Surprisingly neither wants to go on the computer. last night they finally played outside around 7:30. If it could just be cooler than 100, that would be nice.

Alyssa started drama class this week. Jack will start baseball next Sat. Tryouts are tomorrow.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

 

1st day of school.

yesterday was the 1st day of school:

from Alyssa. I sit next to two annoying boys
From Jack. I am scared, as my teacher is too nice. I want a stricter teacher.

Also Alyssa was exhausted as sunday night she had a hard time getting to bed. As a matter of fact, this morning I had to wake her up at 6:45 and she fell asleep at 8:30 the night before on own. That shows how tired she is. I dont know how to help her get more sleep. How much can be done , if , via nature, a child just has sleep issues. I will continue to help her best I can. I really try to be calm about everything when she cannot go to sleep. the other night I did offer to check on her every 5 minutes , and I did so.

My mom sent pics from when they went to American girl place in NY. I am not going to make any prints as Alyssa was doing "my wrist is hurting" thing again while there and had it "wrapped". I am glad that since we have come back, there have been no "wrappings", but this phase really got to me.

Felix has been told that 50% of his group will be getting laid off. Logic would say that they should keep the good people and senior people, but they figure that they need to get rid of the bigger salaries, not that the salaries are that big! So he is working on his resume and also asking around in the company. I always thought I was at risk, not him. Especially since he gets calls all the time at home about his speciality. But there was some management changes as well recently and noone sees the value in what he knows and does. They think that anyone can do it, but time and time again, noone else has stepped up to the plate.

Friday, August 10, 2007

 

Back to school.....

Last night was meet the teachers and open house night. It was total chaos at the school. This year, instead of listing each teacher and the kids, they listed the kids alphabetically and what teacher they had. I had decided to go to Alyssa's classroom first, since the kindy/1st/2nd hall would be more crowded. The problem was that I also had Jack with me and once AGAIN those two were picking on each other. This did not leave a good impression on Alyssa's teacher that she is stepping on his toes, etc. Also she was suppose to fill out a sheet about herself and hemmed and hawed about it. I did tell the teacher about the ADHD , with mostly distractibility. Alyssa ended up with a girl from last year's class and one other girl that she knows pretty well. She probably knows some of the other kids, but those were the notables. Of course, as usual, there is this one class that seems to have a whole bunch of all the kids Alyssa knows. There always is that one class, but she is not in it. Alyssas teacher is Ms. Yoo. I heard that she is organized and strict, but in a very calm manner. That should be good for Alyssa. So far there are 18 kids in her class. I also signed Alyssa up for a thursday , after school, computer keyboarding class.

AFter socializing some, we went to the other side to meet Jack's teacher. His is only going to be there for 6 weeks until his real teacher returns from Maternity leave. This is one thing about this school that I dont like. The tend to move teachers around from grade to grade, and in the younger grades you have the pregnant ones, that tend to be out a bunch at some point. From Alyssa's kindy year to now, there is probably only 2 of 8 teachers still there. 1st grade about the same as well. Even 2nd grade and some 3rd grade has a turnaround. one 3rd grade teacher 2 years ago taught 1st grade, and one taught 1st or kindy last year. Alyssa's teacher last year taught pre-K for many years and this year is doing ESOL. (english 2nd language). The other thing I dont like is that for 1st grade they no longer break the kids out for math according to ability. That is one thing I previously liked. I dont find this school so great as the years have gone by. They have 100 more students that they anticipated due to some unexpected condo development. The principal just sticks to basics here. Some other schools in the district go beyond to meet the needs of the students. But the alternative is private, which I cannot afford right now.

Anyway, Jack will do fine. he has our neighbor in his class, who is also in TAG as well. It would be nice if they became friends, but Jack is not a "boys boy" so I dont know that they will. There is a great girl that JAck played Tball with 2 years ago. Felix remembered the dad and mom since he did most of Tball. I bet Jack becomes friends with her. There were some other names I recognized, but maybe 1-2 kids from his class last year. Not any of his "friends", but that is ok. I know that his one friend (girl) is also in TAG with him.

The other thing is that both my kids have very late lunches again this year. Jack is at 12:00 and Alyssa is at 12:30. Last year Jack was 11:35 and Alyssa was 12:20. So even later. The other good news is that they are putting Math first thing in the am. That was a big issue for Alyssa last year. There is new MAth curriculum, so I guess they want to be sure kids are fresh when learning it.
Another neat thing this year is that you can pay online for the cafeteria, as well as monitor your account. No more sending checks in and not knowning how much $$$ you have. And Jack's DEAR time is after lunch, not before they go home, so I can maybe do it here and there if I visit for lunch.

Anyway, I was worried last night about the impression both Alyssa and I made on her teacher. Alyssa with her behavior and myself with how I handled it all, plus the fact that I probably talked too much.

I wont even go into what happened when Felix left to take them home. He wanted to get them food, but they could nto agree, got into a fight, and good for Felix, he took them home and sent both of them to their rooms!

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

 

I know I need to finish my trip info. but......

Wanted to post about yesterday. It was a good day for both kids. Felix picked JAck up and from camp and on his own he came into the house and took his own shower. He then entertained himself and listened very well. Alyssa was with her BFF (the mom picked her up) so I got her around 7:30. on the way , a friend she made at camp called. AFter I got Alyssa she called her back. She also mentioned how she met a friend at camp. When we got home she listened and quickly took her shower and got into bed with no problems.

I wish all days were like that, but alas, this morning was not fun. Alyssa doesnt want to go to camp in the heat and I thought I could take her out when I was going to the dentist, but I am not sure how long the appt is, so I said that I probably cant now and she got upset.

Monday, August 06, 2007

 

back to normal....

THe kids and myself are back from Jersey and life is back to normal. There is so much to write about that I have put this off. Maybe I will do some now and some later, or just gloss over everything. sorta a trip blog.



I went up to Jersey Tuesday night to get the kids. my flight was delayed by 3 hours due to weather in orlando and a mechanical problem. Luckily I did not have the kids with me. The plane I did get was one of hte ones that they have added TV's in the seat backs. That was so neat! I watched HGTV and TLC while on the plane. I was going to read a book on ADD by Dr Sears and someone else, but did this instead after a LONGGG wait at the airport. I do remember having a hard time deciding what to eat for dinner while at the airport. I did not want fast food, but the sandwiches really did not appeal to me. I ended up with one though,



I barely made the bus to get to my parents place.



Wed. was a crazy day. Jack had halloween day at the camp that he was going to. Mon night I had to run out and get a costume for him! luckily they were on clearance at party city. anyway, got him ready for camp and went with my father to drop him off. Then we went to brothers lot where he is going to build his house. AHHH my brother who works as a lawyer and thought he could build a house at the same time.... The one who has to be out of his house in 2 weeks and doesnt know yet where he is going to live while his house is being built. Dont worry , I got at earful from my father about my brother. I got an earful about my bad parenting, I got an earful about even things my mom does wrong in his eyes. I REALLY wanted to ask my father if he ever has anything positive to say about anybody by himself, but decided that I did not want to really cause a scene. I bit my tongue. When I was a teenager I always spoke my mind to him and we never got along. Now that I bite my tongue and just nod, we get along. Since I dont see him very often, might as well. not worth it.



Anyway, afterwards I went to this big shopping center to try to find stuff ot make a "wheel of WOW" for Jack for his carnival project for camp. I needed to make or buy a wheel that spun like what they have at carnival's that give out prizes. Finally got posterboard and foam and managed. The carnival was Thursday. This is what he wanted to do. If i had known my parents had bean bag tic tac toe around, I would have changed Jack's mind. I also bought my nieces their scooters and a gift for my sister in law for taking care of my Daughter. Geesh I quick shopping trip and 150$ later......(cant forget the prizes for the wheel)



My dad dropped me off to my brother's house to see Alyssa, while my mom got Jack. I then spent the afternoon wwith Alyssa and my nieces. I gave my SIL a break and took all the girls to the mall. I am a sucker when it comes to kids that are not my own. I will buy them stuff as long as its reasonable. We got back hours later and we waited for my parents and Jack so that we would go out ot dinner. This is when Alyssa had her meltdown . I knew one would happen when I arrived. It consisted of:

Why did you buy the girls stuff and only got me one little book

Why cant we go out to a fancy restaurant and have everyone get dressed up

Why dont kids leave me alone at school; I cant ignore them when they bother me (left field, huh?)

I dont like my counselor at camp this week (she went to morning camp with the girls everyday)



So now my SIL saw what I deal with. Then alyssa , of course, got "hurt" doing a cartwheel. My family arrived with Jack, and of course, Jack was an angel, seeing that his sister was a mess. my SIL, who had seen Jack misbehave saw what I see; When Alyssa is in her moods, Jack knows to step it up and be the angel child. I went with my father and Jack in one car and the girls all went in the other car. I stayed away from Alyssa at this point. It was better this way. Once again I got a lecture about how this is my fault. My father doesnt believe that maybe some of her issues is because of "how her brain works" and may not be anyone's fault. My mom "wrapped" her wrist and all of a sudden it was all better. Did not know a napkin could do that (enter sarcasm here). We had dinner and departed ways.



Thursday.. Jack went to camp to run his carnival booth. I had plans to have breakfast with an old friend and her 2 1/2 year old, so I would be late to help him out. My parents could nto help him out as they had made plans for the morning. Breakfast was great. Its nice to see my old friends in Jersey as I only go up once, maybe twice, a year. I really wish the kids could have gone down to her house at the shore and we could have done the carnival rides like we do every year, but this year we did not have the time at all. oh well... That has always been fun! After breakfast I joined jack. It was in the 90's, and being in the sun running his booth sorta sucked. Now here is something interesting. I found the boys at his camp to be larger than the boys down here in in atlanta metro. Is that because many of them are italian(where not all, but I believe many italian families center around food) , or does it have to do with the fitness level between the two areas.
After camp, it was too hot to go to any pools, so we came back and my SIL dropped off the girls so that she could do stuff. I kept Jack separated from everyone else to "keep the peace". I also got a chance to sit down with my nieces some. The quieter one really wanted my attn. I sat with a book and started some beginning reading. The book was "Go Dog Go". Later I got ready and left around 5ish to take the train to the city to meet an old friend of mine that I met during a USY convention (united synagogue youth) when I was 14. As teenagers, even though she lived about an hour away, she was my best friend. In some ways Alyssa mirrors my life that in high school most of my friends did not live in my town or were in my grade, except for the friend that I had breakfast with earlier in the day. Alyssa tends to make friends outside of school, or her one friend that moved.

GEtting back .. I took the train to the city. When I changed trains to get to Penn station, it turned out the tunnel was blocked , so it took quite a while to get in . The same happened for her, so we met up at the same time at this fun bar called 230 fifth. Its rooftop and was hopping. Since we are both pretty good looking women for being in our early 40's, we had soooo much fun. On an empty stomach the martini affected me right away. We stayed for quite a while and then headed back to penn station and grabbed some thai food around there. Took the 11pm train home. Even though I can stay up as late as I want as an adult, I still knew my parents would worry and had to consider them, so I came home early. If I was not staying with them, i would have stayed in the city longer. Its funny how I feel so much like a child still; even moreso than when I was in my 20's. I guess I want to be more considerate now.

Friday:
Last day of camp for everyone. Then after Jack's camp I got Alyssa and all her stuff. She was sad to say goodbye to her cousins. We came back and hung out inside since it was hot. then again, around 4:30 I took the car and met another friend in Morristown for dinner. She also has kids, but once again, getting the kids together would have been too much. I was actually home by 8:30. It was nice talking to her as well. We discussed a lot about our kids since she has some "issues" with hers and I took in advice as she has done a lot of reading.

Sat:
Ok, yhou can tell that I am getting tired of typing. Sat was spend with Felix's brother. Maybe I will talk about that tomorrow. Not that it was exciting, but just to add to another page.

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