sandy's general musings

Well for a weekend that was suppose to be dull, not the case. Friday night I wanted to take the kids to see the Bee movie. Their first non matinee. I asked a friend who has a son Jack's age and then one that is pre-K. She was not sure. I offered to even take her older one if it was going to be too late for the younger one. This friend is pretty overprotective of her kids. Meanwhile my other friend called that has her DD that is Alyssa's friend since way back in pre school and also her son that is a year older than my friend's young son and over a year younger that jack (in kindy). I mentioned that maybe I could take her kids, as I first offered to take her DD, but she said that both her kids would want to see it. When my other friend called back, she said that she could not make it , but could I take her son. I said sure, but then mentioned my other friend's kid and she got upset because she said her son did not know those kids, and that only really knew Jack. So I called the 2nd friend up and told her it was just too much for me and 5 kids and that the other adult was not coming; to make up for it, I offered to take both her kids for a sleepover Sat night. I ALWAYS get in these situations where I try to make everyone happy and I end up in some way making noone happy; in this case I think I mopped it up enuf to fix it. I was actually pleased that my 1st friend finally trusted me enough with her kid. I have offered many times to take him and she has turned me down.

The movie was fun. I even enjoyed it. After the movie I sent the boys to the bathroom. Little did I know that my friend wanted me to take her almost 7 year old son to the womens room instead. I sent the two boys in together and stood outside the mens room. There were tons of other kids and parents around. I know that Alyssa is already uncomfortable when she is in the girls room and boys come in. Will have to ask if I was out of place.

Sat, Alyssa had skating. she is complaining that the rink is now too cold (compared to teh summer!). well after Sunday morning when she went outside with just a tank top and shorts in 50 degreees she will no longer have a complaint. After skating her friend was going to see the movie. I really wanted to go to the mall. Alyssa wnated to see the movie again with her friend versus going to the mall. So that was done. I guess she really liked it.

Sat night the other friends came over. Jack and the boy played very well together. I got the boys to bed around 10ish. The girls (well mostly Alyssa) were going wild. Alyssa just gets so obnoxious and bossy so much. I know that is part of her ADHD, but I kept warning her to stop. I said no sleepover for her bday if she didnt. She didnt stop. So now I will stick to my word, I hope. I cannot have her behave like this when others are spending the night -its too much. I stettled the girls in the guest room becaues it has a TV and I believe they were asleep by 11.

The girls were up 7ish old time, and 6ish new time. Shortly afterwards they made enough noise that the boys were up. They preceeded to play "slide down the stairs with the sleeping bags". A fun, abeit maybe somewhat dangerous game. I supervised. I did this as a kid. Noone did get hurt and they all had fun. then Alyssa and her friend went outside with their American girl dolls with Alyssa barely wearing much..... Sign..

They left and I ahd to run errands. When I came back I found the kid's scooters by the new neighbor's house. Apparently they had gone over there. Jack likes the kindergartener. Alyssa liked playing with the 4th grade boy, but he prefers the 5th grade tomboy that lives next door. Alyssa feels very excluded. Everyone is hanging out at the basement of hte new neighbor. I know that the tomboys' middle school brother and my other neighbor who is in middle school was over there as well. So we get to sharpiegate......

Jack has a bday party and Alyssa went to the gym with felix.. they came home and she stapled her thumb... Just a bad day for her overall.. Lack of sleep...... Felix brings her to meet me with Jack at the schools "get fit" day at the park. The kids really did not want to many of the group stuff, but prefered to play on the playground. that was ok.

WE got home and the mother of the home called me about some "Graffiti". I came by and by her driveway was written in sharpie "XXXX and XXXX are dum and fat. She spelled the boy's name wrong. FYI the tomboy is a big heavier. Alyssa got angry because was excluded. Well there was also graffiti written on the studs in teh unfinished basement. That one was NOT Alyssa. It said "fuck you man". Alyssa would nto even know to write that, or have a reason to! The problem is that because she had a sharpie and did the other writing, all the kids scapegoated her on that one. I know one of hte middle school boys did it, but they wont confess to anyone, including all the other kids.. Other kids were out (middle school and another grade school) to hear about this and I heard them trying to scapegoat Alyssa on that one. I did interfere and say that it was not her handwriting, nor did she know that phase ---which I am sure of based on questions I asked. She also did not know where in the basement or how it was written (vertical).
I did have Alyssa apologize to the two kids she wrote what she did about and we talked about how she feels left out and was angry with them. She also gave some $$$ to the mom to help pay for stuff to remove the "graffiti" I also talked to Alyssa about sharpies versus chalk. I really really believe that
1. she does not know that phrase.. IF she was to use the F-word, it would not in that context
2. she would not write on walls/wood studs in a house. Concrete yes, inside a house, no.

the mom says that noone is allowed to play in her basement until the person who did it fesses up. Alyssa and I talked about how one of the other kids are lying, and that even if they dont get caught how that is affecting others who can no longer play other there.. how lying is bad, even if you do think you will get away with it.