sandy's general musings

Well the party is over ... I really know I went overboard this time. Alyssa probably doesnt appreciate it all. LAter Sat night, after the party, she was having one of her meltdowns and one thign she said was how "this was the worse day of her life" . Then I asked about how it could be with that party. Then she said "the worse day after the party was over". On one hand I created this monster, in the fact, that I sorta spoil her. I sometimes wonder if her issues are not "real", but because I did create the brat. I think in some cases, that is true, but I think again and these meltdown over silly things dont seem "normal" even for a spoiled child.

I was so tired from this weekend. GEtting only a bit of sleep on friday night affected me. Plus with one of the girls at the party having a cold, I am trying not to get sick. I take lots of airborne. It also irks me that Felix has gotten "bad" again. When he had his heart condition he spend a lot of time on the couch, etc. Now its his sinuses. I know that they bother him, but sitting around all day isnt going to fix them. I get all pissy at him, because I have to constantly ask him to get up and help. He never just "does it" anymore. When I feel this way towards him I also tend to hold back physically and emotionally. I dont want to go through another surgery with him. The sinus thing would not be a biggie, but still, he is not a great patient. Since we have been married we have gone thru tonsils and hearts. Now its sinuses. I do have some sympathy that he has issues, but I dont believe in his methods. He is overweight and sitting around is not helping that. Yesterday, yes, he did the photos for me, but that is about all he does do and he enjoys it. Meanwhile I am running around with kids all day. While I am complaining, he also will not do anything to go out of his way for the kids. AKA, I wanted him to go to school tomorrow to do Alyssa's bday, but he refuses to take off of work to do that. I have to do it now. Whenever he does have a day off of work while the kids are in school he wont meet them at lunch. He says that noone did that when he was kid, so why should he do it. I tend to disagree. The kids just light up when you join them at lunchtime.

Ok. done with my morning rant. I dont mean to rant on him, but I guess its a good therapy sometimes to get it off your chest.